Relationship - Religious Discrimination

Before preaching of love and fairness in treatment, how much do you actually practise them?

Yes, generosity, great patience and tolerance are required when opening up your welcoming arms to people who do not share the same belief or perspective in life. It is undeniably a munificence in accepting one into your life to share the moments, but will you bring someone across that border to be in your life?

From a religious perspective, be it quoting from the Bible or al-Quran or other holy books in the world, a large percentage includes a verse that basically says, "love is for all". Despite being the 'chosen ones', you are taught/commanded to love everyone, both lovable and unlovable. Ask yourself this question, would you be in a relationship/marry a person who does not seem to share the same beliefs and practices with you?

Let's narrow down the terms 'belief' and 'perspective' to the religion aspect.

If you are a monotheist, would you prefer going after a person who shares the same religion, who attends to the same practice, who thinks God should/shouldn't be put priority before anything? If either one is missing, would you doubt if that person's mindset resonate with yours and if it would cause a fissure in your relationship?

There are two main religions that I would like to highlight here :
Let's say you're a Christian, would you go after a person who has not baptized even though one is open to the practices?

Let's say you're a Muslim, would you go after a person who does not cover her head or not dressing according to how the Quran has taught even though one believes in the prophet Muhammad and Allah S.W.T?

Compromising can be hazardous sometimes.
When you compromise the little things that seemingly harmless despite sharing the core foundation of belief, you would find the little things eventually being magnified and irritable. You might start thinking why can't one fulfill the little commands when one has believed in something so majestic?

People with a religious pillar seems to have a paranormal strength to lean on but they are, too, the ones that receive more jibe and slander having to stand up for their faith and live up to their beliefs.

Religion seems to be preaching a love that the world shares.
But at times when I ponder and reflect on the various people I have met, they seem to be sharing the same religious discrimination and apparently they are unconsciously preaching the ideology to the next generation.

似是而非

如果有一天你发现...
我被写在你的故事里，
而你却不曾出现在我的场景里，
可以不要难过吗?

因为我发现，
你是本打开着的书，
而我，
畏畏缩缩，
启开的钥匙紧握手里。

你跟我坦白过你的过去，
但你不知道我的过去。
你没问，
我也没想说。

曾经有个男孩像你一样，
付出的真心一摞摞。
可是把鱼饵丢进了弃湖里，
徒劳无功。

稚气懵懂的我，
以最恶劣的方式
快刀斩乱麻，
结果害得双方偏体鳞伤。

感情不是越有经验，
就一定懂得处理状况。

我只希望
历史   不再重演。

遗言？Last will ?

如果哪天我离开了人间，

我要认识我的人把和我的回忆，

写在面子书上。

这样，

我家人可以看得见，

女儿在外留下的印迹。

If one day I left this world, 

I hope you would post our memories on my Facebook wall

even if we are mere acquaintance.

Then my family would get to reminisce

the trails left by their daughter.

死神......再次拜访街坊邻舍

死亡，其实离我们很近很近，只是我们视而不见而已。

2015年6月7日，
死神，
再次拜访街坊邻舍。

打开报章，翻阅每则新闻报导着死讯...
沙巴大地震10多个人生死未仆、曼谷爆炸所幸无人伤亡、印度渡轮沉没淹死29人、意大利难民船倾覆300多人亡等等，

有感触吗？

感慨着人生无常，
唉声叹气以后，
翻阅下一页。

直到，
手机响了。
“Loqman......”

噢，找到了，死了。

那一刻，很平静。

打开房门把这消息传达给正午睡的母亲，
从床上弹坐起来，“蛤！”

颤抖了一下，
这个消息......是这样的效应。
无语了，回到客厅呆坐着。

Loqman...
回想一下与他的回忆、
他留下的印迹。

在外地求学，
放学后对繁重功课的不满怨声连连时，
他每个星期准时到孤儿院报到，
爱心爆棚的教育着颇有优势的孩子。

放假了，
一颗炽热的心、
一个麻雀虽小五脏俱全的背包，
远走他乡，游玩山山水水。

闲暇时，
一台老爷车服务着载送，
赚取旅费，为人正直。

因为归天了，褒义词一摞摞？
不。
交情尚浅，曾经的来往却是如此。


2010年1月17日龙舟事件历史重演。
人家说，芳龄到了半百，噩耗连连。
身边人一个接一个......
季节性的归回西天。

17岁一次、22岁一次，
死亡幽灵在我面前带走了同龄人，
仿佛警告着，
“别以为你年轻，还有很多时间。”

有好几次，
我对生命充满了臆断。
有好几次，
上帝把我抱离了悬崖边缘。

和死神打过交道、
目睹领走旁人者，
更能领悟
 “活好当下”
“珍惜眼前人”。




恶讯来临之时，
第一个浮现你脑海的
是什么？

Thanks for the honesty, S.

Every individual has been in some endangered situation once in a while. I realized many times in life I've put myself in danger. The danger-danger kinda situation. (Funny how sometimes repetition of words make the original meaning of the word more intensified) Parking lot, dormitory, a strange city, car...

As I look back, it hit me that I was actually vulnerable and literally placed my safety into other's hands. I was oblivious about it. I kept thinking I might be of help by keeping the person company. Little did I know that I was actually luring, tempting... giving opportunity to possible tragedy.

I felt the same terror in me again last night. I was scared. The chilling sensation deep down in my bones that I didn't realize until when I was home, I heaved a sigh of relief and caught myself trembling all these while.

Reading the article helps. It was totally an eye opener to me. Shedding light to my naive-self that I was not as powerful as I thought I could be. Influence takes the right person, right moment and right place to slowly dissolve into someone.

Part of the article.

Healthy Approaches to Dealing with and Expressing Anger

• Using feelings of threat and distress to cue yourself that you are beginning to be angry
• Not sweating the small stuff and heading off anger before it escalates (This is no big deal)
• Using humor to defuse the tension in the situation
• Using movement or exercise to drain anger away
• Becoming more flexible and accepting of things others do
• Writing about the anger (Use size 24 print and a bold type on your computer, then delete it.)
• Drawing pictures about anger
• Looking for and admitting your part of the problem
• Sharing feelings and discussing the issue from an emotional level Gently confronting the irrational ideas of yourself and the other person
• Problem solving the issue using conflict negotiation
• Taking Time Out to cool off, and then come back to address the problem
• Breathing and calming to talk your anger down ( I can handle this. I'm cool. etc.)\
• Observing your physical reactions, thoughts and feelings
• Finding the errors in your thinking that triggered anger
• Trying to see the issue from the other person's point of view
• Take constructive action to make changes about the situation (MAD-Use your anger to make a difference
• Using relaxation techniques such as Eye Movement Desensitization, Thought Field Therapy, Emotional Freedom Technique, Tapas Acupressure Technique and Progressive Relaxation to release anger.

You might think I'm facing some anger issues or abusive matters but that is only part of it. I tend to write things in a vague manner because I don't want to recall the details when I read back the articles I posted. They aren't exactly memories of cotton candies and unicorns anyway, but I definitely cherish every bits of them when they're still fresh in mind. It's a constant reminder of the wonderful individuals I met who tried to present their best for me, how protected I am by strangers or mere acquaintances. I sincerely wish that you would meet an amazing person that brings out the better in you. Love.