The College Soul For A University Student

I got this book as a Christmas present for last year but I only got it this year in February.

When I first opened the gift wrap, I laughed. 

I thought, how cute. I'm in my final year of university now.

I'm pretty sure most of the content won't be relevant to me now,

as I've passed those phases of 

identity-seeking, being chained to conformity and whatnot.

Then, I thought, oh well, I'll just read through 

and see how much resonance it has with the then me 

who had her first gingerly step into this new city, away from her parents' prying eyes.

I had read only 50% of the book and I completely changed my mind.

It wasn't that shallow as I thought it would be (how to find yourself a friend; how should you dress up; how to adapt to new surrounding; how to live harmoniously with your roommate etc)

Yes, the book does cover all of that.

But the way they are presented is much sophisticated and captivating.

As it focuses more on insights and inner feelings,

you can relate to it no matter what walks of life you're in.

It talks about growth, passion, society, love;

broad aspects that can strike a chord with anyone 

from having just started college to having graduated from college for years.

I thought it was going to be a series of how-tos,

like a Dummy guidebook for freshmen.

I am glad that I was so wrong.

Here's one of the many excerpts that ring a bell and
serve as a reflection of how we once were.

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So, college is the perfect place to find---or redo---yourself. Suddenly, without parents and high-school friends who remember when you tripped down the stairs at junior prom, it's a level playing field. The time is ripe to explore that long-concealed interest in pre-Cambrian fossils or to date a goateed poet type.

But once you have to the chance to be anything you want, you face the really tough questions: What do you want?

It's harder than it sounds. What you think you want when you're surrounded by familiar faces looks different in a new place. Things you thought were cool suddenly appeared dorky, irrelevant or simply wrong. In high school, I was sure I'd fall in love with the first man who wanted to talk about Hemingway; but when I met that person, I hated his guts. I thought I'd find my voice in a college classroom; but in the end I was much happier scribbling down my thoughts and discussing them in the relaxed atmosphere at a coffee shop.

In other words, if you yearn to be someone quite unlike your high-school self, be fearless. Try whatever you can imagine until you find something that really fits. But in the meantime, go easy on yourself and others who are shopping for a new identity.

...it finally became clear to me why I'd come all these miles. It wasn't to become a completely different person. It was simply to figure out how to be comfortable with the person I was---not only at a huge university in an edgy city, but inside my own skin.

-Wendy Marston-