Every individual has been in some endangered situation once in a while. I realized many times in life I've put myself in danger. The danger-danger kinda situation. (Funny how sometimes repetition of words make the original meaning of the word more intensified) Parking lot, dormitory, a strange city, car...
As I look back, it hit me that I was actually vulnerable and literally placed my safety into other's hands. I was oblivious about it. I kept thinking I might be of help by keeping the person company. Little did I know that I was actually luring, tempting... giving opportunity to possible tragedy.
I felt the same terror in me again last night. I was scared. The chilling sensation deep down in my bones that I didn't realize until when I was home, I heaved a sigh of relief and caught myself trembling all these while.
Reading the article helps. It was totally an eye opener to me. Shedding light to my naive-self that I was not as powerful as I thought I could be. Influence takes the right person, right moment and right place to slowly dissolve into someone.
Part of the article.
Healthy Approaches to Dealing with and Expressing Anger
- Using feelings of threat and distress to cue yourself that you are beginning to be angry
- Not sweating the small stuff and heading off anger before it escalates (This is no big deal)
- Using humor to defuse the tension in the situation
- Using movement or exercise to drain anger away
- Becoming more flexible and accepting of things others do
- Writing about the anger (Use size 24 print and a bold type on your computer, then delete it.)
- Drawing pictures about anger
- Looking for and admitting your part of the problem
- Sharing feelings and discussing the issue from an emotional level Gently confronting the irrational ideas of yourself and the other person
- Problem solving the issue using conflict negotiation
- Taking Time Out to cool off, and then come back to address the problem
- Breathing and calming to talk your anger down ( I can handle this. I'm cool. etc.)\
- Observing your physical reactions, thoughts and feelings
- Finding the errors in your thinking that triggered anger
- Trying to see the issue from the other person's point of view
- Take constructive action to make changes about the situation (MAD-Use your anger to make a difference
- Using relaxation techniques such as Eye Movement Desensitization, Thought Field Therapy, Emotional Freedom Technique, Tapas Acupressure Technique and Progressive Relaxation to release anger.
You might think I'm facing some anger issues or abusive matters but that is only part of it. I tend to write things in a vague manner because I don't want to recall the details when I read back the articles I posted. They aren't exactly memories of cotton candies and unicorns anyway, but I definitely cherish every bits of them when they're still fresh in mind. It's a constant reminder of the wonderful individuals I met who tried to present their best for me, how protected I am by strangers or mere acquaintances. I sincerely wish that you would meet an amazing person that brings out the better in you. Love.
