步入了社會，
共度五年成長的大學朋友
也如中學時代的朋友，
各分東西，展翅追求理想。
離開了當下的圈子，
拉開了新里程碑的序幕。
群體也好，兩人之間的關係也好，
都需要共同站在一個陣線上。
站的次數越多、越久，
關係就越鞏固。
少了一起為同一件事努力的機會，
就少了交流，少了親近。
少了風雨，又怎能有彩虹的燦爛？
所謂天時，那個時段抽得出來嗎？
所謂地利，那個地點能達得到嗎？
所謂人和，那個誰和誰肯放手嗎？
兩個人的相處，需要天時地利人和。
Friday, January 13, 2017
兩個人的相處，天時地利人和
兩個人的相處，需要天時地利人和。
步入了社會，
共度五年成長的大學朋友
也如中學時代的朋友，
各分東西，展翅追求理想。
離開了當下的圈子，
拉開了新里程碑的序幕。
群體也好，兩人之間的關係也好，
都需要共同站在一個陣線上。
站的次數越多、越久，
關係就越鞏固。
少了一起為同一件事努力的機會，
就少了交流，少了親近。
少了風雨，又怎能有彩虹的燦爛？
所謂天時，那個時段抽得出來嗎？
所謂地利，那個地點能達得到嗎？
所謂人和，那個誰和誰肯放手嗎？
步入了社會，
共度五年成長的大學朋友
也如中學時代的朋友，
各分東西，展翅追求理想。
離開了當下的圈子，
拉開了新里程碑的序幕。
群體也好，兩人之間的關係也好，
都需要共同站在一個陣線上。
站的次數越多、越久，
關係就越鞏固。
少了一起為同一件事努力的機會，
就少了交流，少了親近。
少了風雨，又怎能有彩虹的燦爛？
所謂天時，那個時段抽得出來嗎？
所謂地利，那個地點能達得到嗎？
所謂人和，那個誰和誰肯放手嗎？
Tuesday, January 3, 2017
2016 Recap
I felt like I needed this. This long transcription of my thoughts.
Stepping out of student life, leaving behind the title that grant you mercy at faulty times, and into the world of total independence(well, not if I’m posted to Penang) is a huge transition. The gap in between is a transition period. As much as how I would like to think that I am eventually coming out of this phase, I feel the urge to properly recap 2016. There was so much going on and so little that I scribbled.
I stopped uploading photos and sharing my life events frequently about four years ago. I don’t feel the need to publicize everything. I don’t feel the need to share the joy. I cherish the moments and my friends know I do. I feel like the acknowledgement among ourselves suffice. Okay, maybe I’m just lazy to upload photos and write significant captions sometimes…...okay, most of the time. Well, the downside is I keep all these memories with my own effort instead of letting internet do the job. Disc space, virus protection, file locations etc… I have to make sure I don’t lose them.
Pacing in the light of 2017, I feel like I need to let the events in 2016 sink and count the blessings within. So here I’m going to try my best to recall as much as I can. I’m posting this because I want Facebook to remind me one day on how much tougher I’ve grown in the year 2016.
Jan ‘16
- It’s my final year of Degree. Not much emotion actually.
- Just another new year, another new semester. Everything was so...normal.
**********
Feb ‘16
- Queensbay’s CNY decor was a blast!
- A lot of meet-ups and reignited familiarity.
- Papa-chan wrote me in his blog and a gush of warmth wrapped my heart.
- It’s the beginning of my 3-month long practicum. The admins and colleagues were welcoming and kind.
**********
Mar ‘16
- First Hung wedding!
- I broke down in school. There was too much weight I put on myself. I wasn’t finding trouble. They bothered me because I valued them. Well, I toughened up. I have more experience to share and inspire now.
- There’s a status I posted on Facebook that I would like to share here as well :
It's my second time wearing punjabi suit to this school that I'm teaching in now. I still had pupils finding it amusing and their interest piqued. A group of my Moral pupils came surrounding me and asked, "Teacher, why are you wearing Indian people's clothes?" I wouldn't say I did not expect this type of question but to intrigue them enough to brave up and ask me(I'm very fierce one ok), they must have failed to come up with a satisfying reason themselves.
I can't help but to wonder, why didn't anyone ask me such question when I wore baju kurung? Why didn't anyone ask me "Teacher, why are you wearing Western people's clothes" when I went OL style? Children perceive normal and reasonable as something they encounter always. Rare sights will be deemed weird and questionable even if they root from the same perspective.
My mom was pleased when she learnt that an Indian teacher in the school gave me two sets of punjabi suit and a set of lengha. "It's unity and acceptance in action", she said. Being the first Chinese teacher they have, I would say I was glad I exposed them to the true beauty of embracing the Malaysian culture.(And I explained to about four classes that it was punjabi suit and not saree. Young generations need more exposure to their own country's cultures.)
**********
Apr ‘16
- The heat of DOTS was insane.
- I was offered the title “Guru Cemerlang” but I rejected. Recognition from people I look up to and satisfaction from myself were enough. I won the fight.
- Quote of the month : Knowing Why is not enough, you’ve gotta know How to deal with Why.
**********
May ‘16
- Took up sensei’s challenge and participated in the 32nd National Japanese Speech Contest. Was too bogged down with responsibilities in campus and was too confident in myself as well. Thought since I had conquered reciting Japanese poem in a huge event, memorizing a speech wouldn’t be too hard for me. Quivered lips and icy hands turned into a huge disappointment in sensei’s face. I cried like a baby in the phone for the first time after 4 years. I wrote an article about it and got it published in IPBA magazine.
- It’s the end of my 3-month long practicum. I wrote this :
https://www.facebook.com/notes/chrislyn-hung/when-curtains-fall/10154113921339054
**********
Jun ‘16
- Christina Grimmie died. I had always loved her bright personality.
- Some heart-to-heart talk with secondary school friends that resulted from years of growth. We sighed at how time flies.
- A short and sweet mini family trip that put a genuine smile on our faces.
- Scrolled through Facebook posts and realized I did a lot of thinking and wrote quite a few so-called ‘deep thots’. I kinda miss that. Sharing my share-able thoughts.
**********
Jul ‘16
- The starting of Pokemon craze!
- Discovered my ‘other half’ in Hong Kong. Dang, dem feels~
- The first wave of hurricane.
- Getting addicted to Huffington, Thought Catalogue and other similiar read.
**********
Aug ‘16
- Immersion.
- Postponing the idea of taking JLPT, again. Tsk tsk, procrastination.
- LCW VS LD
**********
Sep ‘16
- Of blizzard and warm packs.
- Getting bogged down by assignments, thesis and presentations.
- Attended an international conference(TEFLIN) and presented a teaching aid project with friends in Indonesia. Great honour and learning experience indeed.
- Conquered Mt Bromo and all but had food poisoning for ten days.
- Bonds.
**********
Oct ‘16
- A leap of faith.
- Nailed my viva.
- Appointed to be the emcee for one of the sessions and got selected to be standby presenter in a conference meant for lecturers and professors. Quite a regret that I wasn’t needed in the end.
- Represented my campus to share my research in IPIK and broke their wireless pointer. *awkward laughter*
- Farewells.
**********
Nov ‘16
- Exam month.
- Surprise!
- Took part in an international conference/competition(MELTA). Was way too carried away by joy and jumbled up all my explanation. Haha. I still had fun!
- Indulgence.
**********
Dec ‘16
- Dusting Realistic Terebinthia.
- Of priorities and insecurities, of doubts and reassurance.
- A short getaway to Kob khun kha-s.
- Counting down new year with headache, stomachache, vomit, dizziness, fever and love.
Conclusion?
It’s a year of love, for love. Well, which year isn’t?
Stepping out of student life, leaving behind the title that grant you mercy at faulty times, and into the world of total independence(well, not if I’m posted to Penang) is a huge transition. The gap in between is a transition period. As much as how I would like to think that I am eventually coming out of this phase, I feel the urge to properly recap 2016. There was so much going on and so little that I scribbled.
I stopped uploading photos and sharing my life events frequently about four years ago. I don’t feel the need to publicize everything. I don’t feel the need to share the joy. I cherish the moments and my friends know I do. I feel like the acknowledgement among ourselves suffice. Okay, maybe I’m just lazy to upload photos and write significant captions sometimes…...okay, most of the time. Well, the downside is I keep all these memories with my own effort instead of letting internet do the job. Disc space, virus protection, file locations etc… I have to make sure I don’t lose them.
Pacing in the light of 2017, I feel like I need to let the events in 2016 sink and count the blessings within. So here I’m going to try my best to recall as much as I can. I’m posting this because I want Facebook to remind me one day on how much tougher I’ve grown in the year 2016.
Jan ‘16
- It’s my final year of Degree. Not much emotion actually.
- Just another new year, another new semester. Everything was so...normal.
**********
Feb ‘16
- Queensbay’s CNY decor was a blast!
- A lot of meet-ups and reignited familiarity.
- Papa-chan wrote me in his blog and a gush of warmth wrapped my heart.
- It’s the beginning of my 3-month long practicum. The admins and colleagues were welcoming and kind.
**********
Mar ‘16
- First Hung wedding!
- I broke down in school. There was too much weight I put on myself. I wasn’t finding trouble. They bothered me because I valued them. Well, I toughened up. I have more experience to share and inspire now.
- There’s a status I posted on Facebook that I would like to share here as well :
It's my second time wearing punjabi suit to this school that I'm teaching in now. I still had pupils finding it amusing and their interest piqued. A group of my Moral pupils came surrounding me and asked, "Teacher, why are you wearing Indian people's clothes?" I wouldn't say I did not expect this type of question but to intrigue them enough to brave up and ask me(I'm very fierce one ok), they must have failed to come up with a satisfying reason themselves.
I can't help but to wonder, why didn't anyone ask me such question when I wore baju kurung? Why didn't anyone ask me "Teacher, why are you wearing Western people's clothes" when I went OL style? Children perceive normal and reasonable as something they encounter always. Rare sights will be deemed weird and questionable even if they root from the same perspective.
My mom was pleased when she learnt that an Indian teacher in the school gave me two sets of punjabi suit and a set of lengha. "It's unity and acceptance in action", she said. Being the first Chinese teacher they have, I would say I was glad I exposed them to the true beauty of embracing the Malaysian culture.(And I explained to about four classes that it was punjabi suit and not saree. Young generations need more exposure to their own country's cultures.)
**********
Apr ‘16
- The heat of DOTS was insane.
- I was offered the title “Guru Cemerlang” but I rejected. Recognition from people I look up to and satisfaction from myself were enough. I won the fight.
- Quote of the month : Knowing Why is not enough, you’ve gotta know How to deal with Why.
**********
May ‘16
- Took up sensei’s challenge and participated in the 32nd National Japanese Speech Contest. Was too bogged down with responsibilities in campus and was too confident in myself as well. Thought since I had conquered reciting Japanese poem in a huge event, memorizing a speech wouldn’t be too hard for me. Quivered lips and icy hands turned into a huge disappointment in sensei’s face. I cried like a baby in the phone for the first time after 4 years. I wrote an article about it and got it published in IPBA magazine.
- It’s the end of my 3-month long practicum. I wrote this :
https://www.facebook.com/notes/chrislyn-hung/when-curtains-fall/10154113921339054
**********
Jun ‘16
- Christina Grimmie died. I had always loved her bright personality.
- Some heart-to-heart talk with secondary school friends that resulted from years of growth. We sighed at how time flies.
- A short and sweet mini family trip that put a genuine smile on our faces.
- Scrolled through Facebook posts and realized I did a lot of thinking and wrote quite a few so-called ‘deep thots’. I kinda miss that. Sharing my share-able thoughts.
**********
Jul ‘16
- The starting of Pokemon craze!
- Discovered my ‘other half’ in Hong Kong. Dang, dem feels~
- The first wave of hurricane.
- Getting addicted to Huffington, Thought Catalogue and other similiar read.
**********
Aug ‘16
- Immersion.
- Postponing the idea of taking JLPT, again. Tsk tsk, procrastination.
- LCW VS LD
**********
Sep ‘16
- Of blizzard and warm packs.
- Getting bogged down by assignments, thesis and presentations.
- Attended an international conference(TEFLIN) and presented a teaching aid project with friends in Indonesia. Great honour and learning experience indeed.
- Conquered Mt Bromo and all but had food poisoning for ten days.
- Bonds.
**********
Oct ‘16
- A leap of faith.
- Nailed my viva.
- Appointed to be the emcee for one of the sessions and got selected to be standby presenter in a conference meant for lecturers and professors. Quite a regret that I wasn’t needed in the end.
- Represented my campus to share my research in IPIK and broke their wireless pointer. *awkward laughter*
- Farewells.
**********
Nov ‘16
- Exam month.
- Surprise!
- Took part in an international conference/competition(MELTA). Was way too carried away by joy and jumbled up all my explanation. Haha. I still had fun!
- Indulgence.
**********
Dec ‘16
- Dusting Realistic Terebinthia.
- Of priorities and insecurities, of doubts and reassurance.
- A short getaway to Kob khun kha-s.
- Counting down new year with headache, stomachache, vomit, dizziness, fever and love.
Conclusion?
It’s a year of love, for love. Well, which year isn’t?
Friday, December 2, 2016
What is the purpose of your life?
I may not have the ultimate answer to the very first question
"Why do you think the human race exists in the first place?"
For that we would need to bring in
the evolutionary theory
the big bang theory
God's creation theory.
But at this point of my life I believe
that it's because of love, I survive
and it's for love that I live.
The love for Mother Nature
The love for beauty
The love for wonders
The love for humanity
The love for mystery
The love for truth.
It's for love, that I live.
"Why do you think the human race exists in the first place?"
For that we would need to bring in
the evolutionary theory
the big bang theory
God's creation theory.
But at this point of my life I believe
that it's because of love, I survive
and it's for love that I live.
The love for Mother Nature
The love for beauty
The love for wonders
The love for humanity
The love for mystery
The love for truth.
It's for love, that I live.
闯关·后（社交婉语篇）
It’s okay.
It’s okay.
这只不过是人生中很小很小的一个环节。
让这个环节深深烙印脑海的是你的感受。
记住你所经历的每一个感受，
细心咀嚼，探索自己的内心世界。
当你把诚意捧上，
法官冷眼对待，你的感受是什么？
当你屡战屡败，
士气受挫，你的态度是什么？
当你脑海浮现不同思维，
潜意识列出了不同方案，
你的决定是什么？
也许成功与否由不得你，
决定权落入他人手中，
可以选择的是自己的心境。
很多时候我们觉得自己有得选择人生，
随着岁月渐渐发现恰好相反。
很多时候我们觉得自己改变不了人生，
但却忽略了选择心境的权利。
看似渺小毫无威力的琐事，
卻是定夺人生的关键。
如老子曰：
Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.
似乎掌控了思绪，就能掌控命运。
但思绪，能与感受相盈吗？
Monday, August 15, 2016
Midnight Monologue
“很久以後，我明白到信仰是一場冒險。
當我竟然追到答案，感到平安毫無憂慮之時，正是我墜落之始。
Hey, 生命豈有一本天書提供所有答案予你，無須經歷跌倒與碰撞，仿佛Google map一樣為你定下清晰路線？
沒有沒有。你會迷路，你會疼痛哭泣，但你會找到屬於你的信仰以及意義。追隨耶穌意味背起你的十字架，學習認識自己認識生命認識愛與犧牲。我不肯定這時候就是教會經常掛于口邊更豐盛的生命。我只能說這是一條很精彩的路————如果你不甘於虛假的平安與喜悅的話。讓我們同來一場循規蹈矩的信仰冒險吧！”－－洪麗芳
Screenshot了那麼久，反復咀嚼這段文字無數次，今晚竟然有一語點醒夢中人的感覺。
是剎那間想通了嗎？還是又是自以為的mind conditioning？
說到mind conditioning，又是很值得探討的課題，下次吧。
“追隨”二字，有夾帶“相信”與“知道”嗎？
要知道了，相信了，才能追隨一件事/一個人嗎？
之前的猶豫與躊躇、不甘受洗、對於侍奉心有餘悸……都建立于“不相信”源於種種的疑問。
但，真的有那麼一個完整答案解開所有的疑惑嗎？就算有，我們有辦法解開所有的疑惑嗎？還是新疑惑只會不斷湧現？
曾經，把一些問題交到文人/領袖級人物手上，卻發現沒有人可以滿足你尋找的豁然開通明了的解答。是自己潛意識擬定了一個答案想尋求認同嗎？還是自己根本就不明白自己在尋找些什麼？
順道對最後第二句的回應：“如果你不甘於虛假的平安與喜悅的話”。
何謂“虛假的平安與喜悅”呢？
或許我能理解“虛假的平安”源於唯有得主赦免脫離死亡才是真平安，
那“虛假的喜悅”呢？
難道不相信耶和華，我的喜樂皆虛偽、不屬實嗎？
不過，今晚不談“虛假”。
今晚談“追隨”。
今晚談“追隨”。
回歸正題。
“追隨耶穌意味背起你的十字架，學習認識自己認識生命認識愛與犧牲。”
難道不能嘗試跟隨，再尋找屬於你的信仰和意義嗎？
聽起來好瀟灑，好像很可行。
雖然知道自己的固執，即使問了也可能堅持己見。
但還是會問一下，給自己個定心丸，做好了本分再做決定總比忽視也許寶貴的意見來的恰當吧。
唔，有新領悟了喔。嗯，不錯不錯。
好，繼續加油！追根到底吧。
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